what's the line between love and hate?
what i thought as a kid was clear,
made me sit stiffed
with two packs of cigarette boxes
and a half-empty booze bottle
when mom landed her palm on my cheeks
it stung, i knew it was love because
she told me it was for my sake
and i would thank her later
when dad neglected me like i was
dust in thin air, i knew it was love because
to be recognized is to please
so i grew up dancing on strings
when you discarded me and refused to
come back, i was lost
i let you land yours on mine
and i stayed put like i always did
where did i do wrong?
i did them out of love,
just like how my parents taught me
instead, you glanced at me with disgust
"love yourself first and foremost."
maybe, our definition of love was different
and maybe, i need a century to figure it out
